Keeping Score
by Satanic Mechanic
Summary: Because sometimes there is a method to the madness, and sometimes, someone really is counting. 5x3, oneshot.


Satanic Mechanic: So this is my first Saiyuki fic, and it's Gojyo/Sanzo, because well…there needs to be more of that.

Man, it was hard to write this too, but I guess it's always hard when you start to write for a new fandom. And Hakkai's name pisses me off, because I always type 'Kakkai' instead. Ok I'll just shut up now, because I'm sure you really don't care.

XxX

When you're on the road as much of the four of us, you have to come up with something to keep yourself busy, to keep yourself sane. Not that I'm implying any of use are even close to being in perfect mental health, but I digress.

In my case, I would come up with little games. One's that only I could play, in my head. Now you know what I was talking about when I mentioned the poor mental health thing. Sometimes I count how many times Goku would say 'I'm hungry' in a day. Just incase you were wondering, I usually lost count around 40 or 50. But my absolute favorite, the one that was the most amusing, was to see how long I could push Sanzo's buttons before I was in risk of losing a limb.

"Kappa, if you don't stop kicking my seat I'm going rip out your eyeballs and piss on your brain." I hear a dark voice mutter from the seat in front of me and cease my movements. Ouch, Sanzo-1, Gojyo-0. You know, that was a new one too, it seemed that the monk was getting a little more creative with the threats lately. I guess he had to though, 'die' sort of lost it's effect after the first hundred times you hear it.

"Oh my, that would be an interesting sight." Hakkai mused and I didn't have to see his face to visualize the usual plastered on smile that was sure to be there. "We should be reaching the next town soon, please be patient." Is snort at that and prop a leg up against my knee, it being slightly strained from it's recent activity. That was another one of my games, counting the minutes after Hakkai declared we would be reaching our destination soon, and waiting until we got lost in some random forest.

"Mmm…you know, it doesn't seem like there would be a town near here. The trees are just getting thicker." Goku speaks warily from beside me, and I'm actually impressed for once that the little brat had actually figured it out. But, Hakkai keeps driving, Sanzo keeps smoking, and the trees keep getting thicker and thicker as we go. Random forest, here we come.

"We'd better make camp, it's getting dark already." Hakkai sighs and puts jeep into park, climbing out and the rest of us follow suit. Exactly 45 minutes and 12 seconds after we had entered the forest mind you, I know, because I counted. God, I really need to get some better hobbies. "Gojyo, could you start unpacking?"

"Gladly." I give him my most charming smile and go about doing my standard task, the manual labor. Hakkai was probably working on dinner, and I'm guessing Goku is off gathering firewood. Sanzo is doing his job just as well, sitting around on his holy ass, smoking a cigarette.

So I go about unpacking the usual stuff, sleeping bags mostly, trying to resist the urge to kick Sanzo when he points out I should lift with the knees and not with my back. I take out a black, over-used cooking pot, and place it over the fire wood Goku has arranged quite nicely. Hakkai smiles gratefully, one that I know is actually genuine for once, as I flick my lighter to get the flames started. He pours a mix of different foods in the pot, probably preparing some sort of stew, easy to make and very filling.

That is of course unless you are the world's biggest walking black hole. Goku downs his portion easily and is already whining for more, no surprise there. Of course there isn't any left in the pot, as we are currently on a budget we can't by as much food as usual. Sanzo kindly offers his plate up to the animal, or maybe it was just to get him to shut up, either way, that's what he usually did. Now I don't normally like to argue with that, as it keeps my own food safe, but the damn monk is already thin enough as it is, enough to actually worry me even. Hakkai seems to share this opinion if his disapproving look as Sanzo begins to scrape off his plate is any indication.

"Hey, Monkey, take mine instead, I'm not hungry anymore." Sanzo looks up at me from underneath blonde bangs, annoyance clearly evident in his eyes, but he pauses in his plate scraping anyway.

"Mind your business Kappa."

"Hey, I'm just trying to help out. So you can stop worrying about maintaining your girlish figure now." He glares up at me and I don't break my gaze because I feel like I'd be losing something, and I don't know if I've said this already, but I goddamn hate losing. Goku meanwhile, is switching from looking up at me to over at Sanzo like some sort of confused puppy dog.

"What? It's okay, I'll take both of your food!" He offers, and weather or not he's trying to break up the fight or just score more food for himself, I guess the world will never know.

"Can it, idiot." Sanzo growls out and continues looking at me as if I'm road kill or any other sort of unpleasantly smelly things.

"So you both hate my cooking that much?" Hakkai spoke lightly and I knew he was just trying to break us up like the mother he loves to play the part of. Sanzo sighs at this and leans back against the tree behind him.

"It's not that. I'm just not hungry, end of story."

"Regardless of hunger or not, you need your strength. Need I remind you of how you passed out after our last Youkai ambush?"

"Hn." Sanzo looks away and begins poking at his food absently, it seems that all eyes are on him until he finally takes a small bite, and then we go back to our devices. Goku snatches up my food before I have a chance to change my mind, and Hakkai feeds Hakuryuu over his shoulder.

Sanzo-1, Gojyo-1. Well, maybe that was really more of Hakkai's point, but I was the one who initiated the whole thing, so I'm still counting it as my own. Besides, I highly doubt if anyone is going to protest. I do know I need to come up with a tiebreaker match soon, but that can wait till after dinner. I really hate that he could be beating me at a game he doesn't even know he's playing. Guess that's Sanzo for you though.

We're all pretty tired, with the seeming endless fighting, not even including the fighting amongst ourselves. The ambushes were a quick way to pass time at first, the assassins sent to kill us far to weak to do damage, it almost seemed pointless. It starts to wear down on you after while though, and I sometimes think that is their aim, to drive us insane from the annoyance until we'd eventually surrender.

So while sleep would be a refreshing option, there's times when it seems all too much like death, the very thing that has been chasing us all over the damn country side. This was one of those times. At least I had picked a nice night to be an insomniac though. The sky was clear and the temperature was mild, and I try to remember what group of stars is Ursa Major, but I was never really good with that stuff.

I hear a slight shuffling to my left and see Sanzo's sleeping bag twitch out of the corner of my eye. I find myself silently praying that he doesn't wake up and ruin this perfectly content atmosphere by being an all around miserable bastard. No such luck though, it seemed that sort of thing was very limited to me outside of card games as I watch him sit up and search through his robes for something. He finds what he is looking for and doesn't seem too pleased before he crumbles up the empty cigarette package and chucks it at some poor unfortunate tree.

"What are you looking at?" He asks when he notices I am awake as well, probably getting a whiff of the smoke he so desired.

"Just the stars, it's pretty clear out. Trying to find that bear thing…"

"Ursa Major?" He asks, and I am surprised that he's even interested in continuing the conversation, never mind the fact that he actually knew what I was talking about. But I guess one learned a lot of useless information when growing up in a temple.

"Yeah, that's it."

"You can't see it? It's that box…with like…little squiggly lines coming out of it." He scowls when I laugh out loud. "What?"

"Nothing, just not used to hearing you describe anything as 'squiggly'."

"Whatever."

"I still don't see a bear."

"It's right there…" He groans in frustration, as if trying to explain how a baby was made to a small child. "Across from the North Star…you do know what that is right?"

"I'm not that stupid." I shake my head and find the brightest star I can. "Oh, I see it now." I take a closer look at the thing, squinting my eyes a bit. "Is that really supposed to look like a bear? What were these people smoking?" He snorts at that, and not even the 'you idiot, why do you even bother to open your mouth', kind of snort. It's almost as if I had just amused him somehow. I should get a metal or something.

"The idea was to make the sky more familiar, rather than something so huge and intimidating."

"Wow, I didn't know you could be so insightful." I gasp in mock awe.

"I'm just repeating what I've heard." He shrugs and looks up at the sky for a few moments, and I catch a glint of foreign emotion in his eyes before it's gone a second later. "You got an extra cig?" He turns to me and I chuckle slightly. Just when I thought we might actually be having a civilized conversation, it turns out he was just trying to butter me up to feed his own addiction. Of course, I could be wrong, but Sanzo almost always had ulterior motives.

"What's it worth to you?" I grin and he seems to consider this for a moment. I am slightly surprised, his addiction must be getting stronger than I thought, before he shakes his head.

"Nevermind, the last thing I'd want is to owe you a favor." I should have already anticipated that answer, the guy always thinks he has something to prove.

"Fine, suit yourself." I shrug and lean back down into my sleeping back, still staring up at the stars, for lack of anything better to do, watching the wisps of smoke trail off and disappear.

"Shit, now I'm really awake." Sanzo opens his mouth again after a few minutes of silence, and I light up another smoke, not really having the urge, but figuring that it would make him squirm anyway.

"Join the club. Still sure you don't want that cigarette? All it would cost you is a brief sex act of your choice-" I am cut off by a well placed whack on the head from his infamous paper fan, before he tucks it back into wherever the hell one hides those sort of things. "Come on, lighten up, I'm just messing with you." I throw an arm over his shoulder and he visibly tenses like he always does from physical contact. Weather is from outright hatred or some sort of insecure phobia, I don't know. Either way, it's fucking adorable.

"Well don't." He spits out and throws my arm off as if it's made of acid. See? I told you, it's precious. Maybe I really do need to get help. I sigh and flop back down into my sleeping back, turning my back to the annoyed blonde. I smile to myself as I wonder how long it'll take him to notice the cigarette I oh so suavely slipped behind his ear from the contact. After a few moments, I hear the familiar click of an electric lighter, and I let that smile grow into a smirk. Sanzo-1, Gojyo-2. Shit, I really love winning.

"Thanks." I hear him speak softly, and if the night wasn't so dead silent, I probably wouldn't have been able to hear it at all. I find myself wondering how bad that must have killed him, to say thank you I mean, to me of all people. I also find myself wondering why I even give a shit. Why I hadn't turned my back already and let the bastard rot in his own desolation, instead of wasting so much time and energy.

I guess it was sort of like what I had told Hakkai, that if someone wanted to die that badly, I just couldn't stand back and let it happen. So if Sanzo was on a mission to be a miserable, lonely bastard for the rest of his life, I was going to do my best to make it real difficult. After all, besides being a poor loser, I really am an asshole at heart.


End file.
